How do you rewrite the stars?
There is joy in holding onto the traditions and practices of our culture. We grow up believing in them. It is when we grow up we start questioning these practices. One of these practices that bothered me the most was falling in love. Growing up I was taught it was wrong and so I stuck by it, no questions asked. But now as an adult, I wonder as it doesn’t make any sense.
I am not aware if this is followed all over India but I do know it is followed in most parts of Tamil Nadu. Very few have the liberty to escape this and live as they want to. Falling in love is not an option here. Growing even I thought it was wrong. Indeed, it is not needed at a young age but I don’t see the problem in searching for a partner at the right time. I guess I also realized that you don’t always have to search for it, sometimes it just happens. Even then that liberty is for a very few only. I by chance you do meet someone you could spend your life with and try hanging out with them, you will be considered a spoiled brat and it’s even worse if you are a girl. I was taught this growing but it never really bothered me as I never took an interest in it. What bothered me was that you can’t even choose your friends. You make friends with the opposite gender and they sing the same song again. It’s sad really how our lives are destined by the ones around us and not ourselves.
Sometimes, I wish I had a voice to show the world how our lives are destined for us. To tell the ones after me that it’s alright to fall in love. That it’s alright to choose your passion as your career. That it’s okay to chase your dreams. It’s you who decides who you’re friends with. No one should have to tell you who you want to be. It’s alright if you have not figured out what it is that makes you unique. It’s easier for some while it’s hard for the rest of us, but you will find what it is that you are good at and what it is that makes you, you. No one should have to decide who you love and who gets to spend their life with you. This society puts pressure on us that not only don’t we have a voice to speak out our opinions, but we also don’t have a say in our life’s decisions.
I had to go through this and the worst part was I never searched for a partner. All I wanted was a friend who understood me. But then I did find a few who understood me. I had built a wall so high inside me that I don’t easily let my guard down. I guess it’s because I knew how it would end. It was hard for me to find friends here as my tastes were completely different from the ones here. I had my flaws but I never failed to see the magic in the world. I guess that’s why despite everything I still do let my guard down once in a while. This world we live in is so full of magic but I find very few people who see the magic in it. Everyone wants a miracle, magical solution to their problems but they fail to see the magic. It doesn’t always have to make sense, sometimes it just is. This society pushes us so much that now I have no one to open up to but I guess it did do me a favor as that’s what made me write. I figured if I had no one to listen to me, and so I started writing them down. The writing was an escape from the realities of the world.
All these practices and traditions that we follow and have been following, we do for the sake of love. Even though they don’t always make sense we do it, all in the name of love. I guess in the end the only thing we can ask ourselves is LOVE WORTH LOSING OURSELVES OVER IT.
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